bruised and sore 
       from you
                 between my legs
waiting for the next time
       when you will penetrate my flesh

and teach me the lessons
         that I have learned
                                   till now
the lessons
        that leave me lame
the lessons 
        that burn my flesh

        and leave me wanting you.

fear
           eaten up
swallowed  by  a  snake
     and
           fighting from the inside
                     to get out.

struck by the venom
           paralyzed  and
             eaten up
  inhaled
           sucked in
     by  the  snake,
      the  python  of  fear.

sliding into the pit
           the inner lining
              of the beast…

waking up in darkness
           stillness
   no room to breathe or move
        the noose tightens.

        the fight begins.

struggling from the inside
           to get out
pounding the leather walls
  digestion 
           about to commence.

the snake
  is pleased to
    consume its quarry.

the quarry
           undead
  and battling
                      the python
  from the inside
                      out.

we lost something 
                       tonight…
i'm not sure what it was
but I can feel it.

            something
                   between us…
            a trust perhaps,
a belief in the honesty
         and sacredness of the other...      a being true.
 

it happened quickly
           and I felt it
             move from my body
           just as swiftly and surely
as the
       deer runs
                      to quench its thirst.
we lost something
            and I feel the loss.

confused      and hurt
                   and angry
                             with you
            for wanting her
                       and
             pretending 
                      you didn't want her
when it was obvious
                                you did.

please don't lie to me
about lust
           because i understand it.

i wanted someone   tonight
           but
i played the game
  and pretended I didn't.

you should have played the game
           because
now i'm hurting from watching you.

The world is brighter
                       and better
                                  because of you…

                       You……..a sensational little boy,
                            so perfect and full of wonder,
                  so ready to join life and be part of its marvels.

                        You…….a brand new life,
                            who has made his entrance
                               amidst all of creation.

                        an uncharted future lies before,
                           like a royal carpet about to be unfurled,
                               fascinating adventures waiting to be explored;
                        a universe patiently marking time
                              until your tiny footsteps
                                  make their imprint
                                       in the pathways of time.

                       The world is brighter
                                              and better
                                                        because of you…

                              The world is wiser
                                               and  richer
                                                        and will never be the same 

               we're  Boomer Canadians
                    we're not used to this,
               we're Boomer Canadians
                    and we believe in peace
                        at almost any cost.

                                we weren't brought up to fight
                                   and defend our country
                                    (except on video games),
                               we don't really know how to wave our flag
                                  and sing our anthem proud
                                                                    and bold
                                   and be          patriotic,
                               after all … we might insult someone
                                         or infringe upon their rights.

                                 our parents knew the ghastly deeds 
                                                                      of war and more
                                   and spoke in muted terms of death
                                          and lambs slain on the fields,
                                                    of mothers, fathers,
                                                      brothers, sisters, friends,
                                  laid alone to rest in
                                                     countries far from home.
    but us… 
   we're the Boomer Canadians
      we're not used to this,
            terror clamoring at our doorsteps
              reliving the murder of thousands     dressed like us
                        through our television sets
    watching over and over      and over and over
        making sure it's not an evil dream  or
              newly released action movie.

              us…Canadians
                        we light a candle and pray for peace
                                                   and empathize,
    we pray not to be the prey
              for we aren't used to this
                        and truly don't know
                                 the wages of war.

  I was thinking of you
         and wanted to write,
    so I sat down on the bench
                                   still wet from the rain
                                             and began …

  the waters were calm
         and the crows were calling
                                             greetings
                  to all who would pay attention
                    on the morning airwaves,

  I listened to the distant crickets
          and watched 
                             a sowbug
                              crawling laboriously
            on his own meaningful mission,

and wondered
         how
                  we can be on the brink 
                                              of war
         when     nature is at peace,
                   how can we      be
                             on the brink of war 
                             so terrifying in possibilities
           when
                       nature is at peace?

         boaters were out on the lake
           my neighbour mowed his lawn
             and the clouds were gently gathering
                                               without a sound.

and then
                   the rain began to 
                            fall
       and I was forced to retreat indoors
as the crows halted their cries
   the sowbug took shelter
  and the crickets hid  in silence.

         this poem is for you…
                   the world
                      is still beautiful
          though our countries speak of war.